Negative Nancy.........

That's me or should I say my name lately has been Mara. Mara was the name that Naomi gave herself in the book of Ruth. I've been feeling very resentful, angry, depressed, just down right unhappy and well............like a door mat. Randy does not help out around the house or yard. He comes from a messy family and so he's used to it, it does not bother him at all. At least when it comes to his crap around the house, in every little nook and cranny. I'll stop now, because I could get really carried away with how I'm feeling about all this. I come from a very neat and tidy family. Both of my parents were really into style and neatness.
We are a family of 5. In that family, there is only 1 person who cleans..........me. I don't know why, but I can't keep up. I try, I really do but the house is always a mess. Dust bunnies are everywhere, crumbs, dog hair, stuff...........URGH!
I'm to the point of just throwing my hands in the air and walking away.................really. I have told Randy how I feel so many times, he just does not get it. There is more to my unhappiness, it's Randy's and my relationship or lack of.
Some have noticed that I'm blogging or on Facebook a lot. Yes, I am, I admit it. When I'm angry, stressed or just need time for me, I head back to my Mom cave and hide on my computer.
Right now my kitchen sink is full of dishes, the dishwasher is full. I have piles of laundry on the bathroom floor. ( I don't have a laundry room) There is dust and grossness everywhere. Did I mention the dog hair..........so icky!!! Let's see, there is kid stuff, Randy stuff and clutter too.
Why did I start this post? It was not to vent, although it has felt kind of good. LOL
I started this post to say that I'm going to pray, pray and pray some more for God to give me super powers and to change my awful attitude. Today is a new day, I don't want to be Mara.
OK, I'm done and now ready to tackle the house.
Have a great weekend everyone.